Unfortunately, things were going late, as they always do at UN conferences. I had wanted to participate in the first International Youth action, a giant flashmob outside one of the plenary, but gave it up to do this instead. I could have done both if I’d know how behind schedule the press conference would be where we were giving away the petition.

Me with my 0 box.

When it was finally time, about 14 youth each carrying a giant box with a number or word on it, walked into the room and onto the stage. Wow, the cameras flashing and snap was ridiculous. For a second I kind of felt like a celebrity. Of course I wasn’t the center of this action. That was Connie Hedegaard, Yvo de Boer and a youth named Leah Wickham from Fiji. To see pictures by one of the Youth photographers Robert van Waarden from Survival Media, check out his website here!

As we stood there with our boxes raised, this incredible girl started to speak. She talked about her country, about how she wanted it to survive this climate crisis. As she talked more and more about its beauty, culturally and naturally, she started to cry.

Of course no one laughed. This was serious stuff. Important people throughout the room (it was only for press and delegation parties) were hearing firsthand from someone who would directly be affected by climate change and was scared out of her mind. I took a second to think about why I was here. My country wasn’t at risk of sinking completely underwater and we won’t have to move to another nation when sea levels do start to rise. No, compared to others, Americans have much less to worry about when it comes to the affects of climate change.

Waiting outside the press conference for it to begin.

Regardless, I thought about that kind of fear. Mostly I worry about my school work or if my parents are happy with me or when I’ll see my friends next. I worry about climate change too, but I never worry about it as a problem for me directly. I am concerned with the issue, because I want to help those who need more support and a stronger voice when it comes to the dangers of climate change. As I started to picture myself actually worry about my home disappearing and having to move to another country as an immigrant, and as I heard this girl continue her speech, I couldn’t help but cry with her.

Laugh or think I’m corny if you want, but then take a minute and think about what I just imagined. Now imagine it too. NO REALLY THOUGH. Move away from your computer, sit down, and think for at least three minutes about how you would feel if your home was at risk of going into the sea and the people who had the power to change this didn’t give a shit. Without the direct words of this girl passing through your eardrums at the same time, you might not have as strong of a wave of emotions as I did, but I guarantee you’ll be thinking about climate change in a way you never really did until now.

Monday, December 7th

Let me just give you all a quick play by play of what my morning was like, and will be like, for the next two weeks:

-Wake up between 6:00 and 7:00 in our crap hostel (no internet, we cannot use the kitchen because we aren’t a “family” or “individual”, no eating or drinking in our rooms, no breathing, etc.)

-Go to breakfast (leave backpack outside because it isn’t allowed in, make sandwiches and put in pockets anyways)

-Get on the bus for 30 minutes

-Get on the M Tag (metro) for 15 minutes

-Go to the Bella Center office after passing numerous groups of protesters (some are good, some are crazies like the Asian TV network SuperMasterTV that wants all the world to be vegetarians)

-Get in line for security (similar to an airport, except you can bring liquids in as long as you sip some in front of the guards)

-Get your badge screened

-Wait in line for 5 to 10 minutes to check your coat

-GO!

It’s wonderful to see more friends who have started to arrive that weren’t here for COY. It’s also incredible to walk down the hall and, oh look there is Kumi Naidoo, ED of Greenpece International. Hmm and there is Jonathan Pershing, USA Deputy Special Envoy for Climate Change.  Who is that lady getting her makeup done over there? Oh, it’s Amy Goodman from Democracy NOW.

Sorry if I’m making anyone jealous. That isn’t the point of this blog post. I just want to get across how completely mad this conference is when it comes to opportunities for meeting some of the most influential and motivating people surrounding the issue of climate change. This isn’t always the case of course. There are a lot of important people here that I proudly walk by without a second glace, because they are the ones who are slowing down this process.

Well, hopefully with hard work, I’ll do my part along with the rest of you the youth to change this as much as possible. It’s already been exhausting and crazy and it’s only one day. I’m still trying to figure out how to actually get things done instead of just spending all day at different meetings, which is usually the norm at these conferences.

Wish me luck! And for those of you who wish you could be here, join the Rapid Response team to get calls each night by me and other American youth to take action back in the USA. Click here to learn more: http://www.powershift09.org/rapidresponse

Monday, December 7th

I arrived in the city of Copenhagen on Friday morning, and instead of being smart and taking it easy, I spent the day scurrying about doing errands and meeting the rest of the SustainUS Agents of Change. By 8:00pm Denmark time, I was exhausted. I had also agreed to wake up even earlier the next day to help register people for COY.

Waking up wasn’t difficult, and once I got to the building and met the 20 or so people who were there early as well, I was instantly energized. The buzz of excitement that was pulsing through these young people from basically all nations of the world was INCREDIBLE. Not to mention that fact that since I was helping to register, I was seeing all my friends whom I hadn’t seen since my last UNFCCC conference in June in Germany.

Joshua Kahn Russell from Rainforest Action Network was there to give all of us a warmup. When the conference started, we had to run around the room and every 3 seconds stop and hug the person nearest to us. It just amazed me! The way we all instantly bonded over the fight for climate justice. At the same time, it made me think a lot about how different it was than the actual UN negotiations. At my last UNFCCC conference, I’d never once seen a negotiator from the USA run up and hug a negotiator from Norway (substitute any countries you’d like here).

Throughout the weekend, I went to numerous workshops to learn more details about the UNFCCC process, how to organize a movement, and even activism art. Each time, I witness a whole room of people, sometimes no one being from the same country as another, work and learn together.

So, why is it that young people have no problem making decisions together quickly and in a civilized manner and yet adults representing entire countries cannot achieve this? Its greed, in my opinion, and the outcome of COP15 is up to the youth and countries that care more about actual survival than money. Thankfully, Sunday evening as I felt the willpower of now over 500 of us youth, I couldn’t help but think there is no way we could fail in making this happen.

What exactly does Climate Justice mean? I could get into the nitty-gritty about facts and figures and targets and adaptation funding, but you can look that up somewhere else on the internet. To me, personally, Climate Justice means that we respect our planet and all peoples on it. This involves fighting for these rights and for the world to appreciate their value.

Back in Berlin (where the Avaaz Action factory was living this summer), we started talking and fantasized about how awesome it would be if a bunch of people in our group of fellows all got Climate Justice tattooed on their bodies. Unfortunately, due to my lack of motivation and non-existent German skills, it never happened.

The idea didn’t leave my mind though. Thinking about when I could get that tattoo, the idea of having it done in Copenhagen seemed really appealing. I was too impatient though, and I wanted it before I arrived at COP15 . So, today I went with my two best friends, Martha Waterman and Connor Gibson, to have Climate Justice tattooed on my right shoulder blade.

Is this a bit extreme? I will now have these words forever on my body. Or at least until I die, as my tattoo artist told me. The bottom line is that for the rest of my life I will have a permanent and visible commitment to this idea, to this movement.

Perfect.

I’ve tried talking to others about Copenhagen’s new pointless goal (according to some world leaders, but not all let me remind you). While my friends are extremely understanding and let me vent, my mood just wasn’t improving. I found myself questioning what the point of me going to Copenhagen even was.

So, I called up Tim DeChristopher, one of the most intense and inspiring people I have ever met.

Last winter, he went to an auction where land in national parks in Utah was being sold for oil and gas drilling. He pretended to be a bidder, bought around $1.7 million in land, and caused quite a bit of ruckus. The auction was halted and then closed. (Read more about him here: http://www.bidder70.org/)

We talked about his trial, the environmental movement, activism, Copenhagen, and him possibly coming to the east coast to speak. Damn, it was a good idea to make that phone call. I hung on to every second of our conversation, taking in what he was saying and really thinking about it. While I treasure what we spoke of and the fact that I am on a first name basis with such an incredible person, I feel the need to share some of his advice. Maybe it will be that pick-me-up for you the way it was for me.

Me: “Well, I’m trying not to get to down about it [Copenhagen]. I’m trying to stay positive.”

Tim responds with something like, “Honestly, I think staying positive is overrated. People have these feelings, these feelings of anger and frustration and fear about this crisis. And we keep them inside and we push them away and we don’t talk about them. We just tell ourselves that if we behave the politicians will fix everything. But they won’t. We need to shut down the fossil fuel industry ourselves and make it known that we’re done with it. We’re scared if it continues, and we won’t put up with it anymore.”

Who speaks the truth? Tim DeChristopher. For real. So what are people scared of? Why won’t we take the step he did last winter at the auction? I tell him about my ideas for radical action at the conference in Copenhagen. They’re badass and I can tell he agrees. Then I explain to him about the reasons I’d be scared to do it and why the rest of the youth may not want to participate either.

“April, whenever you’re in a situation like that, a situation of contemplation, here is what you should think about. Imagine its 2030 and you just met a 15 year-old who was born into this completely broken planet. They ask you, ‘Why didn’t you do anything more?’ How would you be able to justify to him that you didn’t want to risk losing your accreditation at the UN conference?”

“….I couldn’t,” my feeble reply.

Okay, no question about it, I have my motivation and my answers. I know what I need to do in Copenhagen. I also have confidence that the rest of the international youth present there will join me in acting in whichever way is needed.

So, to all who are coming to COP15, please bring: a warm jacket, a fearless attitude, and the belief that we will get the treaty we want. Youth, what do you all say? Ready for this? I SURE AM.

WHAT THE HELL? I continue to read. WHAT THE HELL?!?!?!?! WHAT. THE. HELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“Leaders Will Delay Deal on Climate Change” is one of the main headings of an article. I can’t handle this right now. Not after everything I’ve learned, put faith in, and worked towards for Copenhagen and its outcome. Feelings of frustrating, utter helplessness and the urge to start crying overcome my tired yet furious body. I viciously update my Twitter status to show my rage, busted out a few more blogs (on different subjects though, I’m still too in shock to write about what I had just read), and somehow end up falling asleep.

I wake up the next morning and am fine. For the first three seconds. Then I remember the Times article. How can this happen? Where is everyone? Why aren’t we rioting in the streets? Since when has Obama been all of the “global leaders”. Oh wait, HE’S NOT. Thinking of the Small Island States, Sub-Saharan Africa, Bangladesh, the Maldives, and other countries more impacted by climate change that the USA, I know they will not stand for this idea. This completely ridiculous and stupid idea of making Copenhagen just another talking conference. No more of this talking. It’s time for action.

Right now, I am having my own call to action. I know plenty of youth who will be in Copenhagen, including myself. What I want to be assured is that if things don’t go well, there are people back in their hometowns who are ready to riot and make a scene.

PEOPLE AROUND THE WORLD: STAND UP FOR YOUR FUTURE AND YOUR CHILDRENS’ FUTURE. COMMIT TO FOLLOWING THE CONFERENCE IN COPENHAGEN AND TO ACTING ACCORDINGLY (AKA RADICALLY) WITH WHATEVER THE OUTCOME MAY BE.

Its difficult finding an “ask” for a democratic senator who is already supportive of environmental legislation and progress to combat climate change. A few days earlier, I’d had a meeting via the phone with Rachel Butler, one of my coordinators for the SustainUS delegation. She helped me prepare and gave me ideas on what to talk about, but really this meeting was my own. I’d called the office, I’d pestered the heck out of them, I’d gotten the meeting, and now I was making the trip downtown to exercise my privileges of being part of a democracy.

So, what did we feel was most effective? Telling Leahy he was doing a good job, but that he needed to push harder for a strong, science-based bill and for it to be passed quickly.

We met with Tom Berry, one of Leahy’s staff members. He was really polite and welcoming. I’d attended lobbying sessions before, but I always seemed to take the seat farthest away and never say a word except for a quick “thank you” at the end. This was different. We were a small group, and even though we were young (exactly as I wanted us to appear), we weren’t treated as though we were “too young”.

Mr. Berry gave us the time of day, a lot of time actually. Normally lobbying doesn’t last longer than 15-20 minutes, but we sat in the conference room for about 50 minutes. We talked, we asked questions, we answered questions, we discussed the USA’s policies, and we discussed the world’s policies. Everything was said that was needed to be said.

Yet, it was still discouraging. Another trait Mr. Berry had, one that I appreciate very much, actually made the meeting a bit difficult to handle. This was his honesty. We brought up the fact that if the USA doesn’t get the climate bill passed (it’s currently in the Senate), then the outlook for Copenhagen won’t be good. This is because, due to the fact that the United States is a key player in climate change negotiations due to our extremely large contribution to the problem, many countries don’t want to agree to anything until we do. If we have a bill passed in our own country, it will guarantee that we’ll actually do something, thus influencing other nations to do something, thus making a successful treaty out of the COP15 talks an actual possibility.

What happened when we asked Mr. Berry what he thought about getting the bill passed before Copenhagen? We got his answer. And it was definitely honest, brutally honest. His response was something like, “That just won’t be possible. It will take a miracle. Health care is the biggest issue on the table right now”.

That really put a damper on the meeting. “What can we have done before Copenhagen then?” asked Mikayala. It’s possible to have a verbal resolution passed, but that doesn’t have the same significance as a bill.

Well, it’s certain that the USA’s presence will bring something to Copenhagen, and that is impatience from the rest of the world. The nations of the globe are knocking on our door asking for leadership, but it doesn’t seem to be home.

Some of these people I know personally. I’m close with them. I lived with two of them this summer in Germany. And now the only thing they’re putting in their bodies for a minimum of about 42 days is water.

Friday, I decided to join them in solidarity. I didn’t eat anything all day. Well it was actually for about 36 hours (midnight on Thursday until Saturday morning) until I put something in my stomach again. I will continue to do this every Wednesday until the fast has ended. Who knows when that will really happen?

A girl who participated in the Greenpeace Organizing Term this summer, the program I did in the spring, sent me an email a few months ago about get GOT alumni involved with the Climate Justice Fast. So, I came up with the idea to have each person fast for one day in solidarity throughout the whole period of the fast. Some of us do it once or twice a week; some do it just when there is no one else committed for a certain day. My best friend Connor Gibson, another student here at UVM, has already taken on one day of solidarity fasting. I believe it’s a good way to participate in CJF without seriously risking our health.

I thought I could handle not eating for at least 24 hours, and I was right. What I can’t handle is deeply thinking about the fact that my friends who are fasting long-term are putting their lives on the line for the outcome of this conference, for a solution from the world to stop climate change. My friends could DIE for this. How does one handle such an intense situation?

I have no idea. Sometimes I want to join them for the full-length, especially when I get more and more depressing news about the outlook at Copenhagen. But at the same time that defers me from the idea. Bad outlooks for Copenhagen mean unlikely success, which means no end to the fast, which means dire consequences for the participants. I care about this issue more than anything. It literally consumes my life. But apparently I won’t put my life on the line for it. What does this say about me? About my dedication?

To be honest, I’m not completely sure. I feel a bit guilty, but at the same time I know I’m much more active than a lot of people in this world. Does that make it okay though? That I won’t risk dying for climate justice. Not necessarily, but I think the fact that I believe I’m more useful to this movement alive than dead sure does. Radical action is important. Hunger strikes are one of the most self-less and drastic forms of protest one can undergo. So, I fast in solidarity with CJF, and I dedicate my time to the climate movement. I’ll fight to solve this global problem with all my strength. And when the participants of CJF start to physically loose theirs, I’ll fight even harder. For them, and for the survival of all the peoples who will be affected by climate change.

Want to check it out? Visit here: www.climatejusticefast.com

After organizing and being in charge of the aerial photo, everyone who recognized me throughout the rest of the day was super supportive and friendly. “Great job today!”, “Damn, I’d be so proud of myself if I’d done what you did”, “Way to go April!”. Just really nice comments all around, from people I did know and people I had never seen before.

So why did I feel so strange about the whole process?

Maybe it’s because I was being impatient with my mother after she’d helped with so much of the planning. Maybe it was because I’d been frustrated with my photographer, Elliot, when he continued to tell me the photo looked disproportionate from above. Maybe it’s because it was POURING rain. Maybe it’s because we had to use plastic trash bags to try to keep people dry, which wasn’t actually very successful. Maybe it’s because in the back of my mind I was considering how beneficial an aerial photo actually was to the progression of the environmental movement.

All of these thoughts raced through my head most of the evening. I just couldn’t feel completely happy about how it had gone. Even the words of praise from my best friend Connor Gibson, a true sign of success, couldn’t put me at complete ease.

The comments the article in the Burlington Free Press received online and some of the things people told me that students said about the afternoon didn’t help me feel any better over the next few days. I talked to my friend Jeremy Osborn, who I’d lived with in Berlin this summer. He works for 350.org and was so excited about the day, about our VERMONT photo. They picked it as one of around 300 (out of the 16,000 they received) to be used for media purposes. His enthusiasm made me feel better, because I’d seen how much work he’d put in this summer.

I needed to take some time to think for myself though. About October 24^th. About my work. About the environmental movement. (I continuously need this actually.)

Doing this made me realize that the reason I was so worried about the event was because I wanted to please everyone, to make sure it was heaps of fun and it was seen as this really amazing occasion.  But, that wasn’t the point of October 24^th. I hadn’t looked into the real reasons. This was for Bill McKibben and his organizing, for my friend Jeremy and his hard work, for the movement to solve climate change, and mostly- for the survival of all peoples.

By creating this aerial photo, we contributed to a massive event that was heard by such a large portion of the globe. Our photo, added to the thousands of others that were collected that day, was seen by the world’s leaders. The same leaders that will have their delegations come to Copenhagen, Denmark in December to create a treaty to prevent catastrophic effects of climate change. October 24^th brought attention to the fact that the world wants this out of Copenhagen. Hopefully, in December, national leaders and their delegations will keep this in mind and form a successful piece of legislation for the Kyoto Protocol’s replacement.

Though, I guess I do somewhat owe this man, who officially confirmed the term “stupid American,” for one thing –  a thank you for his encouragement to get involved with the environmental movement. Since I was 17, I’ve dedicated my time to make big changes (unlike a certain president who used that word constantly during his campaign, but has yet to prove it).

I started off small at my high school by joining our Environmental Action Club. Then I worked for the Vermont Youth Conservation Corps last summer. I started my freshman year in the fall at Castleton State, did as much as I could with their Eco Reps program (which wasn’t much) and got out of that place as soon as possible. Spring semester I moved to Washington, DC to participate in the Greenpeace Organizing Term. A few of the best months of my life! I encourage all of you to apply for it.

Once I returned to Vermont, my urge for something new didn’t take long to kick in again. I moved to Germany at the end of May for three months to do activism and ended up going to my first United Nations conference. Scheisse! This introduced me to a whole new level of involvement and a hell of a lot of incredible activists from all over the world.

At this conference, I heard more and more about “Copenhagen.” Literally, this refers to the capital of Denmark. In the environmental movement, this refers to the 15^th UN Conference of Parties (COP15) which will take place in December. Hopefully, the negotiators of the world will come together to write a replacement for the Kyoto Protocol.

It’s understandable if some of you don’t know what this is, seeing as our country was the only one to refuse to sign it (once again a certain vulgar term comes to my mind).

Here’s a quick summary: there was a document created in 1997 which states various commitments countries had to agree to in order to avoid the catastrophic affects of climate change. It expires in 2012, and this is where “Copenhagen” comes into the picture.

I discovered an NGO that was taking a team of American youth to this conference, instantly applied and ended up being accepted. Now, I am an Agent of Change with SustainUS, and I’ll be going to Copenhagen on the 3^rd of December. Basically, my role will be to try and show the world and the negotiators that the USA does care about climate change. Tricky job, right?

I have to do a lot of work to prepare, including plans here at UVM.

My first project on campus has been organizing for October 24^th, the Global Day of Climate Action. An aerial photo will be taken of students using their bodies to create a message involving the number 350. This represents the safe amount of parts per million of carbon dioxide that we can have in our atmosphere. Right now we have 385ppm. Big surprise . . . NOT. Do something about it though!! Help get the world focused on the climate crisis by joining us at 2:00pm on Saturday outside the Davis Center!